You didn't think the government, Wall Street's aide-de-camp, was going to actually regulate the financial markets did you? If so, put on the dunce cap, you deserve it.
The first clue is its name. Paul Volcker heads the Rothschild Family's investment arm (unless he's resigned in the last few years). His writing rules for investment banks is like letting the Godfather write the penal code. Volcker crafted this piece of legislation to placate an angry public knowing that it would never pass into law as written. Its implementation was never his intention or desire.
If you still don't get it, here's a tutorial--and don't take the cap off until it's over.